Walking Through Fear. . .With the Spudster

Spud continues to be a vessel spilling out opportunities for self-reflection.   I know it’s not intentional on his part, maybe not even on God’s part, nevertheless there they are, right smack-dab in the middle of my life!

Noticing my fears seems to be Spud’s latest message!  We recently had two incidents, which drove that point home.  The first was while walking the Rose Bowl (which in and of itself was pushing through the anxiety of ‘would I be able to handle this big white mass of muscles as we approached a variety of other dogs strolling with their owners’  - and we did very nicely, I must say!)  However, about half way around I took a tumble.  Have you ever had that experience, almost an “out of body” when you know you are going down and wonder how this will end!?  Fortunately, no injuries, expect perhaps to my pride as people stopped to help (as a side note, Spud seemed awfully happy to have me down on all fours with him – play time!)

My first reaction - fear!  Would I make it to the car without falling again? What had I done to cause it?  I can never walk the Rose Bowl again.

The second incident involved Spud spotting a coyote and deciding he needed to meet him (I don’t know what the purpose of that idea was, but we can only guess!)  This time my husband was walking him and Spud pulled the leash right out of his hand.  Spud was off and running and in a split second out of sight.  Luckily this story has a happy ending.  A friend found Spud walking down the middle of the street, got him in her car and drove him to our house. 

My first reaction (well maybe second, because the first was gratitude that my boy had been safely returned) once again revolved around the familiar emotion of fear; fear Spud might have been lost forever and fear about the outcome of an actual encounter with a coyote.  I’d better not ever walk Spud again, who knows where the next creature might be lurking that he feels the need to meet!

But you see the thing is, NOT walking Spud is NOT an option!  Twice a day, he reminds me it’s time to head out for an adventure together.  Time to look at the flowers, trees, blue sky, white clouds, squirrels, birds – and perhaps an occasional coyote!  Thank God, Spud does not allow me to succumb to my fears.

I’ll end by paraphrasing a quote from one of the last contestants to be voted off Dancing With the Stars (a source of profound weekly inspiration!)

“If there is something you fear, instead of running away, head straight toward it.  It’s the best feeling in the world when you come out the other side”

So . . . got fear?  Embrace it?  What do you think?

Here's Spud recuperating from yesterday's Rose Bowl walk!